Attractology: The study and practice of becoming your most confident and attractive self.

Conversation Starters

call-meMastering opening and beginning conversation with someone new is essential to your success in attracting.  If you don’t start conversations than you’ll limit yourself to only interacting with people in your social circle or you won’t interact with anyone at all.  Seeing as you’re reading this and have an interest in taking control of this part of your life, starting a conversation is something you’re going to want to learn how to do.

Starting Conversations with Someone New

Because you’re a stranger, when you first go up and approach a someone they will have two thoughts crossing their mind: “Who is this person?” and “How long are they going to stay?”.  The first question can be alleviated by being comfortable, friendly and non-threatening.  Guys: Too many guys approach women with an intent to pick them up and their approaches generally reak of desperation and trying too hard.  The best way to start a conversation is to immerse yourself in the moment and try to enjoy being without having to get anything more than what already is.  When you’re acting through your own intentions you’ll approach not because you need sex, a girlfriend, etc but because approaching is FUN for you.  You should always be looking at ways to make the environment more fun for you.  This is your world and you love to play in it.  And when you do this, you’ll approach without giving it much thought and you’ll also come off as non-needy and fun.

Lines are stupid and hold no real power in themselves.  Your ultimate goal as an attractive person is to feel so comfortable at walking up and talking with someone new that you don’t need a to use a pre-established conversation starter.  However, for most people learning a few icebreakers can be extremely effective in getting over the ‘fear’ of approaching and exercising the social muscle.

Below are some sample conversation starters.  We’ve listed out a few options so that you can get the point.  However, please keep in mind that you really want to be authentic, and should be able to come up with something that is more reflective of who you are as a social person when possible!

Indirect Openers
Direct Openers
Situational Openers
Miscellaneous Openers

Indirect Openers

For those just getting started, opinion openers are probably more suitable. What you say in an indirect opener has absolutely no sexual connotations or hints that you are interested. This is an important factor when first learning to meet women. In fact about 95% guys commit this error when first learning. They show too much intent and women immediately dismiss them as “creepy” guys trying to pick up girls. Going in indirect is a way to avoid that. One way to go in indirect is by having a (what seems to be) spontaneous question that you are trying to figure out. These are termed

opinion openers.

1. Is it normal for girls to snoop?
The only reason I ask is that because my buddy has been dating this girl for a while and they finally just moved in together. And she went through his stuff and found an old box of letters and pictures of his old girlfriend. He doesn’t even look at it. He just has it. Well she found them and now she wants him to burn them or throw them away. Is this a little over the top? Shouldn’t he be able to keep them?

2. Who lies more men or women?
My buddy and I have a joke bet going. He thinks that guys lie more but girls are better liars. And I think that girls lie more because they’re better liars. Solve it for us, who do you think lies more?

3. How do you guys tell if a guy is gay or not?
The only reason I ask is that we’ve gotta a buddy coming out to meet us tonight and we can’t really tell if he’s gay or not. I wouldn’t even care if he was gay, we just want to know. He hangs out with tons of girls but he never dates any of them. It’s weird. But how do you guys tell?

4. If you’re dating a guy and kiss someone else is that cheating?
What if you kiss another girl? Is that cheating. The only reason I ask is because my buddy over there has been dating this girl for a while and she likes to occasionally make out with other girls. My buddy doesn’t like it and says it cheating but she says it’s not cheating. So what do you guys think?

5. Omg…..did you guys see the girl fight outside?
Yea these two girls were fighting outside over this guy named George. Yea they were really really white trash. And as they were fighting one of the girls grabbed the others’ blouse and her boob popped out. But it was nasty white trash boob

6. Hey guys I’m throwing a bachelor party next weekend for my buddy and wants to get strippers. which is fine with me. But I get a call today from his fiancé and she’s like “you cannot get him strippers what so ever. So I’m torn. Shouldn’t a guy be able to get strippers before he gets married?

7. If a guy were to propose to you and give you an engagement ring. But then after you are engaged he cheats on you and you break up with him. Are you still entitled to give back the engagement ring or would you want to keep it just to spite him. The only reason I ask is that this happened to my buddies older brother and he is all pissed she kept the ring. Would you guys keep the ring?

8. Hey if you guys were dating a guy and they decided to go to overseas for a few months how long would you guys wait for a guy before you broke things off. The only reason I ask is because my buddies girlfriend went abroad to France for a temporary position and they decided to stay together, but now she’s over there and decided on a year-long contract. He doesn’t know what to do? Do you think he should break it off with her?

9. Hey maybe you guys can help me out, what’s the best way to end a relationship with a girl without hurting her feelings? My good buddy is trying to cut things off. But he’s doing it right now by just kinda ignoring her and not answering her calls.

Direct Openers

Recognize that too many guys come in direct, with lines like “can I buy you a drink?” or “you are so beautiful!” These are pointless, overused, and simply do not work.. Additionally, because so many guys approach women with these kind of lines, women are often skeptical of direct approaches. However, as mentioned previously, with the right internal game and confidence, you can come in approach directly. You might say something like “I can’t believe it, I’ve been standing here for like 2 minutes and you haven’t even tried to hit on me or grab my ass or anything. So what’s the deal?”

1. Did you save this seat for me?

2. Did you miss me?

3. Hey my girlfriend thinks you’re really hot

4. Hey pretend like your talking to me, my ex is over there.

5. Hey, which way is ______ bar/restaurant/pub/park/(somewhere they are walking in the direction of)

6. You look like a fun person, what’s up?

7. Wow, you look exactly like a girl I went to school with.


Situational Openers

Another way to open indirectly is to comment about something in the surrounding area. “omg… This music is sooo loud!” is a good example. These types of openers are termed situational openers and are optimal for preventing a “non-creepy” vibe while at the same time coming off as spontaneous conversation. However, it must be noted that when using a situational opener, you get a much smaller window for creating conversation. The girl is likely to only respond to your comment which leaves the rest up to you to keep it going.

1. Ohhh my god, I bought my girlfriend a shirt exactly that….I guess that means you have good taste

2. OMG…You look really familiar…How do I know you?

3. You should get the (name of drink)…it’s money

4. Hey can I have 5 bucks?….

5. Weren’t you at the (other bar) last week?—-

6. Looks like the parties over here

7. Those boots are awesome…where did you get them?

8. Omg its so fuggin loud in here

9. It so hot/cold

10. Ahhh there are too many sloppy drunks out here

Miscellaneous Openers

1. Tattoo Opener – Hey I was thinking of getting a tattoo what do you think I should get? What about piercings, should I get my eyebrow done? (even better if you have a picture of several tattoos handy)

2. Nice ass opener – Hey a girl just commented that I had a nice ass; it’s hard to tell myself. Give me a look at your ass. (make her turn around, might not be a good idea if you have a hole in your back) What makes a good ass?

3. Shoes opener – Hey they say you can tell the exact mood a girl is in by the length of the heel on her shoe. If it’s really tall, even if she doesn’t realize it, she wants hot sex, and if it’s really low she’s not feeling very sexual. Hmmmm…. (Continue and 100% correct by the way), hey look her shoes!

4. Eyes opener – Hey let me look at your eyes, they say that you can tell everything by someone’seyes. The small lines in someone’s eyes tell you how strong their constitution is. If they are weak and far apart they tend to get sick often, and if they are tightly packed and strong they are a leader type of person. Let me look at your eyes, hmmmm.

5. Hey guys, I need you all to help me settle an argument my friends and I were having. Is fish considered a meat

6. Is pork red meat or white meat?

7. Ok.. Just tell me, what possible reason would you have, to hide your panties in a mans freezer?!? I had no idea what to do with them, so I just put them back… There still there.

Learn the ‘natural’ way to open in Foundations

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