We talk a lot about first impressions here at Attractology. There’s no getting around it, a first impression is the physical exterior that makes a statement about who you are (or who you might be) as an individual. Is your exterior telling people what you’re intending to say?
Here are five things you may be doing that are sending the wrong signals.

Men:
  • Ironic facial hair.
    • This statement has become huge in the past couple years. From bets, to Mustache March, or simply testing the lengths your facial hair can grow, this is one trend that will get the ladies running… the wrong way. Unless it’s for a good cause (Movember is a great organization and potentially a great conversation starter, just remember to wear something stating your efforts, and keep your stache to the appropriate month)… Shave. Women don’t have the same appreciation for a barbershop mustache like your friends do.
  • Statement Tees.
    • It may have seemed funny at the time of purchase, but your “FBI: Female Body Inspector” shirt is only telling women that you have a questionable sense of humor and a wandering eye.
      Instead, stick to classic solid tees, cut well to flatter your physique.
  • Comfort Gone Wrong.
    • There’s nothing wrong with wanting to feel comfortable in your attire. But there are some things that are better saved for home, on the couch, on a lazy Sunday. These items may include (but are not limited to) sweatpants, Crocs, torn tee-shirts and sweatshirts, athletic jerseys, anything that you may consider your lucky ____ (and have subsequently over worn), and clothing with spots or stains.
  • Ignoring the details.
    • Yes, women will see those white socks you chose to hide under your slacks and oxfords. The small elements that you hoped no one will notice, is sadly something the female gender have a trained eye to see.
  • Faded and misfitting clothing.
    • Once your blacks begin to look like grey, the reds look like pinks, and the perfectly shaped sweater looks like it belongs to your little sister, it’s time to replace. There’s nothing wrong with getting the most out of your wardrobe investments, but learn to know when to let go.


Your physical appearance is not the only thing that women notice. Have an awareness of what your body language and actions are communicating. Are you making eye contact with the object of your affection (or interest)? Or are you constantly checking Facebook/texts/scores on your phone? Is your body positioned away from the person you’re interested in? Are you ordering drink after drink just to keep something in your hand? Sometimes the things we do out of nervousness or habit to pass the time are speaking louder than our own words.

Women:

  • Sour face.
    • When I go out anywhere in public, I’m always keeping an eye on how people interact.  I love to observe body language, and social dynamics as a whole.  One thing that I have noticed time after time, is the sour-faced girl.  You know exactly who I’m talking about.  She’s with a group of friends and because she looks like her favorite parakeet just died, she brings down the attractiveness and approachability of the entire group.  Why?  Because as a man, it can be intimidating enough to walk up to a group of girls, let alone, a group that has a gargoyle as a personal man-deterrent.  No one wants to deal with a sour-faced chick, so quit it.  You’re not only hurting yourself, you’re hurting your friends as well.


  • Weird makeup.
    • One of the advantages of being a gorgeous woman is that you get to enhance your natural beauty with makeup.  However, please make sure that you know what you’re doing.  A little goes a long way, and just the right amount is nothing short of sexy.  Just like you don’t want us to cologne-bomb you, don’t clown-face us.


  • Crazy Talk.
    • This should be a no-brainer, but as we get older and start to lug around more emotional baggage, it becomes more difficult to avoid what has happened in the past as a conversation topic or really anything too controversial.   Nothing will make a sane person run in the opposite direction faster than questions like “You won’t hurt me will you?”  “How many kids do you want?  I want five.”  “I’m still good friends with all my ex-boyfriends, is that weird?”  or my personal favorite “Do you like cats?”


  • The Stalker.
    • In this day and age, everyone has a ton of information about them on the internet.  I get that some of you want to be friends on Facebook before you really get the chance to know that dude you just met.  You want some social-proof on a guy before you move forward.  Understandably, you want to make sure he’s not married, have kids, worship Satan, or whatever else you can pick up from an online profile.  Fair enough.  However, if you know what he is doing at all times due to social media, and bring it up in conversation casually like “How was karaoke last Tuesday at ____________, and who were those girls you were with?”  Don’t get hurt when he freaks the f*ck out.


  • Sluts.
    • Kind of like fast food value meals, they sound better than they really are.  Guys, keep your standards up.  Unless you think you really found love, and we won’t judge you here, try to keep the sluts to a minimum.  Girls won’t respect you because they don’t respect guys that go for girls that don’t respect themselves.   Girls, if you’re just looking for fun, that’s totally fine.  However, if you’re looking for a fulfilling relationship, try to be respectable and keep it classy.  Because there is nothing hotter than a woman who values herself.

 

Don’t feel bad if you’re guilty of any of these.  No one is perfect and these are just tips to help you along your path to love and a fulfilling relationship.   However, if you are guilty of more than three of these things, please contact us ASAP and we will help you!!!   Thanks for reading.

 

Tyler & Carina

The bottom line is this: rejection, like confrontation is hard. No one wants to hurt another’s feelings.
No one wants to blatantly say, “I’m just not that into you.” We prefer to speak with our actions. (After
all, aren’t they louder than words?)
Dating is tricky enough as it is… Finding someone you’re attracted to, getting around to expressing
interest, sparking friendly banter, scheduling the first date, etc… We forget sometimes that finding a
relationship is even harder. It’s hard to find that person you’re willing to continue the song and
dance of dating with and invest in something deeper.
More often than not, you’re going to strike out. I’m not trying to be harsh here. I’m just setting the
stage.  With these odds stacked up against a first date, I don’t typically give a pairing the benefit of the
doubt. I go in as a pessimist, assuming this may be the only time I see the guy I’m out with.
This way, if I do hear from him again and/or we go out again, it’s a pleasant surprise. Not an
expectation.  No one should expect that good conversation and a mutual admiration for the house pinot means
love at first sip. There are always more elements at play.
Like going into a job interview, you may feel like you did all your research, nailed the questions they
asked, and are perfect for the role. At the end of the day, sometimes it just doesn’t work out. The
role was offered to someone else that may have had more targeted experience, a better connection
with the hiring manager, or was willing to take the lower salary.
Sometimes your date will feel, for whatever reason, the chemistry is simply not there.
If and when this occurs, signs will begin to pop up. Less communication. Fewer initiated texts, more
monosyllable responses, less interest to commit to future plans. Learning the language of dating also
means learning the language of rejection.
If someone isn’t actively seeking out your time and attention, you’re probably not a priority for
them. That’s not to say that a few texts here and there can’t lead to another date. Sometimes the
opposite will even occur and you’ll encounter people who are very communicative with their
interest or lack thereof. But the majority of the time it’s subtle language that is going to do the
talking. Learning to pick up on these hints will help you get a clearer message of  someone’s level of
interest in you.  Letting go is the only way to get anything sometimes.  So don’t feel too badly about letting someone down.  It’s just part of the game.